Follow Your Dream
February 2nd, 2008 by Richard CockrumI want to thank all of you who have visited Shards to read Night Child. If you like what you’ve read, please note that there is a poetry category, where you can read all the poetry I’ve put online.
This week I dreamed I was interviewing for some kind of internet job, I can’t remember what it was, but at the end of the interview I didn’t feel like I would get the job, so on an off chance I asked the interviewer if they were looking for authors. At that, his eyes lit up and he said Show me what you’ve got. I started opening up the various web sites I maintain, telling him about them and emphasizing I did all the writing. Then, like a bad cliche, I woke up.
The dream is pretty obvious in what it is saying. I’ve been spending a lot of time lately on things other than writing, or, as the dream says, interviewing for other jobs that I prefer less. The internet, the people that visit the websites, want to see good writing. I want to create good writing. That is where I need to focus my attention and efforts.
How often do we do this? We enjoy something. We’re good at it. Then we get sidetracked. A few days, a few weeks, a few years later we wake up and say What am I doing?
There is nothing wrong with having multiple interests. On the contrary. Spending all your time on just one or two things is stultifying. But, having more than one or two primary focuses with other secondary interests hinders your personal growth and your development of skills. No matter what your natural talent, becoming an expert in a field requires years of practice on progressively more difficult tasks. If you flit from one interest to another, you’ll never be good at any of them.
You won’t be following your dream. You won’t be self-directed. You’ll be reactive. You won’t be guided from within. You’ll be pulled from without. You won’t be living from your core values, but the desire of the moment.
What you’ll end up experiencing is that psychobabble state called cognitive dissonance. You’ll experience the resulting stress, inability to decide what to do, and an utter lack of progress in any direction.
It is a common thing to say Follow your dream. Today I get to do that literally.
Do you know what your dream is? Are you following it?
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February 2nd, 2008 at 12:52 pm
Rick, I really love being a part of this journey with you. Your words always dig into a core place.
February 4th, 2008 at 10:57 am
Rick,
I resemble your dream. I have an emotional reaction to doing what I love. Guilt. I always feel I should be doing something more productive. My wife has the same issue. I can battle through the negative emotion and get to do what I love, but it is easy to slip back under a shroud of guilt of which I need to emerge again and again.
I’ve always wondered where this comes from…
I come from a long line of Scandinavian Lutherans and I wondered if it is the remnant of some old Christian belief system, that life on earth should be a miserable trial of suffering because of original sin, and when I actually begin to enjoy it, I should feel guilt, because it shouldn’t be enjoyable.
Does anyone else encounter this problem? It seems silly, but for me it is very real. It’s programmed into my sub-conscious.
February 4th, 2008 at 11:21 am
Hi Lisa,
It’s a lot easier getting to that core place when that core place reaches out and talks to you as it did in this dream of mine. Unfortunately, all too often we say It was only a dream.
Thank you for helping us remember what’s important.
February 4th, 2008 at 4:19 pm
Steve,
Guilt. One of the most effective and destructive control mechanisms the human race has invented for itself. It starts when we’re infants and our parents keep us from doing something by saying That’s bad! and accompanying it with a loud voice or a swat on the bottom. It continues into school, work, and social situations. Undesired behavior is given a moral connotation.
I don’t doubt that at least part of it comes from religious backgrounds. My background is Southern Baptist. Much the same thing happens there. All the Judaic religions and their offshoots are rooted in the belief in the sinful nature of man and the accompanying belief that life on earth is meant to be hard.
I think most of us experience some variation of what you’re talking about.
Stop wasting time. Do something constructive. What will you get out of it? How is this socially useful?
Strange it is, but much of the personal development sector of the web encourages the instillation of guilt. Maybe not explicitly, but implicitly.
And yes, it is programmed. I know I still experience what you’re talking about. And we pass it on to our children.
It is a habit of thinking, though, a belief like any other that can be changed. It takes time and effort. You’ve seen that, but with time and the effort to change your thinking you can get rid a great deal of the belief, if not all of it.
February 8th, 2008 at 8:31 pm
Rick,
I am SO sorry I have been away for too long. I think this post is really talking to me. I have been away from what I love for too long but I guess I am BACK now.
A great post man. I also agree with you and Steve, there is always a tendency to feel guilty by everyone and as you said, it is something that has been programmed into us right from our childhood.
Guilt is one thing that is difficult to get rid of because we keep seeing so many things as BAD or sinful.
Expect me back soon man
February 9th, 2008 at 11:27 am
Hello Adebola,
No worries. We come and we go with life’s ebb and flow, but it is good to hear from you.
Guilt is just such an effective tool of control I’m not surprised it has been utilized to such a great extent, and we have such a strong propensity to feel it, that learning to get rid of it is something that we all have difficulty with.
February 12th, 2008 at 10:45 pm
Thank you for posting this article. I also try hard to live my dreams and passions as much as humanly possible and this article helps tremendously. My appreciation to you is in the highest sense.
To show you my gratitude I would like to share with you a post I found that also helps with this: http://consciousflex.blogspot.com/2008/01/how-to-find-your-passion-and-make-it.html
Thank you indeed. I hope it helps you and others who read this as much as this post of yours as helped, please keep up the incredible work in helping others!
February 12th, 2008 at 11:12 pm
I’m glad you found the post helpful, divinespiritlove.